Adventures with IKEA Customer Service

The following was received this morning from a young man I know well. His name and particulars have been redacted so that IKEA does not send axe-waving berserkers in longships after him.

START AT THE BOTTOM. Full disclosure: Because the company in question does not include the customer’s original query in its replies, I strung this conversation together in one email message. -- [Redacted]

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Hello [Redacted],

Thank you for your interest in IKEA. We are always happy to hear from our customers.

We are constantly in discussions with cities, developers and brokers about potential opportunities for an IKEA store. However, with only 38 stores in the U.S., our focus is on new location areas consistent with our U.S. and global expansion strategy. (Approximately 15-20 stores open worldwide each year and we must balance our emphasis on a variety of regions and countries around the world.) That being said, we do recognize the customer base that would exist for us in many areas, but currently have not committed to a timeframe for opening an IKEA store in your local community.

Of course, we appreciate demonstrations of support and the desire for us to enter the local community. We continue to evaluate areas that may be appropriate for locating an IKEA store based on our unique business model and the size of our stores. In the meantime, you are welcome to visit our current U.S. stores as well as to visit IKEA-USA.com.

We hope this information has been helpful and thank you again for contacting IKEA.

Best Regards,

IKEA Email

IKEA Customer Care Center

This message is intended exclusively for the individual or entity to which it is addressed. This communication may contain information that is proprietary, privileged or confidential, or otherwise legally exempt from disclosure. If you are not the named addressee, you are not authorized to read, print, retain, copy or disseminate this message or any part thereof. If you receive this message in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and delete all copies of this message.

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From: [Redacted] Email: [Redacted]

Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 9:22 PM
To: 'Customer_Care@ushelp.ikea.com'
Subject: you cannot be serious

Dear IKEA,

Did you see Downton Abbey? All of Lady Grantham’s sinks had stoppers. Why can’t I have one that works properly? You win tonight, but I am going to take this up with the authorities in Sweden tomorrow. For shame, robot. For shame.

P.S.: Nice meatballs. 

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Hello [Redacted],

Thank you for your interest in IKEA. We are always happy to hear from our customers.

We are constantly in discussions with cities, developers and brokers about potential opportunities for an IKEA store. However, with only 38 stores in the U.S., our focus is on new location areas consistent with our U.S. and global expansion strategy. (Approximately 15-20 stores open worldwide each year and we must balance our emphasis on a variety of regions and countries around the world.) That being said, we do recognize the customer base that would exist for us in many areas, but currently have not committed to a timeframe for opening an IKEA store in your local community.

Of course, we appreciate demonstrations of support and the desire for us to enter the local community. We continue to evaluate areas that may be appropriate for locating an IKEA store based on our unique business model and the size of our stores. In the meantime, you are welcome to visit our current U.S. stores as well as to visit IKEA-USA.com.

We hope this information has been helpful and thank you again for contacting IKEA.

Best Regards,

IKEA Email

IKEA Customer Care Center

This message is intended exclusively for the individual or entity to which it is addressed. This communication may contain information that is proprietary, privileged or confidential, or otherwise legally exempt from disclosure. If you are not the named addressee, you are not authorized to read, print, retain, copy or disseminate this message or any part thereof. If you receive this message in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and delete all copies of this message.

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From: [Redacted] Email: [redacted]
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 8:08 PM
To: 'Customer_Care@ushelp.ikea.com'
Subject: my faucet stopper

Dear IKEA,

You remind me of an old girlfriend. Everything was really about something else. I am going to go watch Downton Abbey and afterward, I will come back to see if you have come to your senses. P.S, please send me a new stopper so that my enthusiasm for IKEA does not slip down the drain, so to speak. See below. 

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Hello [Redacted],

Thank you for your interest in IKEA. We are always happy to hear from our customers.

We are constantly in discussions with cities, developers and brokers about potential opportunities for an IKEA store. However, with only 38 stores in the U.S., our focus is on new location areas consistent with our U.S. and global expansion strategy. (Approximately 15-20 stores open worldwide each year and we must balance our emphasis on a variety of regions and countries around the world.) That being said, we do recognize the customer base that would exist for us in many areas, but currently have not committed to a timeframe for opening an IKEA store in your local community.

Of course, we appreciate demonstrations of support and the desire for us to enter the local community. We continue to evaluate areas that may be appropriate for locating an IKEA store based on our unique business model and the size of our stores. In the meantime, you are welcome to visit our current U.S. stores as well as to visit IKEA-USA.com.

We hope this information has been helpful and thank you again for contacting IKEA.

Best Regards,

IKEA Email

IKEA Customer Care Center

This message is intended exclusively for the individual or entity to which it is addressed. This communication may contain information that is proprietary, privileged or confidential, or otherwise legally exempt from disclosure. If you are not the named addressee, you are not authorized to read, print, retain, copy or disseminate this message or any part thereof. If you receive this message in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and delete all copies of this message.

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From: [Redacted] Email: [redacted]
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 7:36 PM
To: 'Customer_Care@ushelp.ikea.com'
Subject: Please replace my faucet part

Dear IKEA,

I keep asking for a new stopper for my faucet and you keep prattling on your strategy for locating stores. I want a new stopper. Please send me one as soon as you can. 

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Hello [Redacted],

Thank you for your interest in IKEA. We are always happy to hear from our customers.

We are constantly in discussions with cities, developers and brokers about potential opportunities for an IKEA store. However, with only 38 stores in the U.S., our focus is on new location areas consistent with our U.S. and global expansion strategy. (Approximately 15-20 stores open worldwide each year and we must balance our emphasis on a variety of regions and countries around the world.) That being said, we do recognize the customer base that would exist for us in many areas, but currently have not committed to a timeframe for opening an IKEA store in your local community.

Of course, we appreciate demonstrations of support and the desire for us to enter the local community. We continue to evaluate areas that may be appropriate for locating an IKEA store based on our unique business model and the size of our stores. In the meantime, you are welcome to visit our current U.S. stores as well as to visit IKEA-USA.com.

We hope this information has been helpful and thank you again for contacting IKEA.

Best Regards,

IKEA Email

IKEA Customer Care Center

This message is intended exclusively for the individual or entity to which it is addressed. This communication may contain information that is proprietary, privileged or confidential, or otherwise legally exempt from disclosure. If you are not the named addressee, you are not authorized to read, print, retain, copy or disseminate this message or any part thereof. If you receive this message in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and delete all copies of this message.

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From: [Redacted] Email: [redacted]
Sent: Monday, January 14, 2013 7:13 PM
To: 'Customer_Care@ushelp.ikea.com'
Subject: My faucet stopper was defective

Dear IKEA,

I sent this note on Jan. 13 and received an email message back about how and why you choose locations for your stores. I do not care about that. Please read the entire email below and send me a new stopper or strainer kit ASAP.

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Hello [Redacted],

Thank you for your interest in IKEA. We are always happy to hear from our customers.

We are constantly in discussions with cities, developers and brokers about potential opportunities for an IKEA store. However, with only 38 stores in the U.S., our focus is on new location areas consistent with our U.S. and global expansion strategy. (Approximately 15-20 stores open worldwide each year and we must balance our emphasis on a variety of regions and countries around the world.) That being said, we do recognize the customer base that would exist for us in many areas, but currently have not committed to a timeframe for opening an IKEA store in your local community.

Of course, we appreciate demonstrations of support and the desire for us to enter the local community. We continue to evaluate areas that may be appropriate for locating an IKEA store based on our unique business model and the size of our stores. In the meantime, you are welcome to visit our current U.S. stores as well as to visit IKEA-USA.com.

We hope this information has been helpful and thank you again for contacting IKEA.

Best Regards,

IKEA Email

IKEA Customer Care Center

This message is intended exclusively for the individual or entity to which it is addressed. This communication may contain information that is proprietary, privileged or confidential, or otherwise legally exempt from disclosure. If you are not the named addressee, you are not authorized to read, print, retain, copy or disseminate this message or any part thereof. If you receive this message in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and delete all copies of this message.

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From: [Redacted] Email: [redacted]
Sent: Sunday, January 13, 2013 4:26 PM
To: 'Customer_Care@ushelp.ikea.com'
Subject: Defective faucet part

Dear IKEA,

I recently purchased a RORSKAR bath faucet with strainer from IKEA’s Schaumburg, IL, location, which is about an hour’s drive from my home. I love the faucet, but the drain stopper (the circular device used to plug the drain) is defective. The little black rubber gasket on the pin is too small and does not create the right tension with the tube in the drain that it is inserted into. It simply falls all the way to the surface of the strainer. Thus, I cannot use this essential element of my stunning new bathroom full of IKEA cabinets and sinks that my friends all come over and admire.

I simply would like another stopper. The entire ORREVIK strainer kit containing the stopper, which can be sold separately, costs $5. I only need the stopper. I also do not want to drive an hour in each direction to get this tiny thing. I looked into ordering one online and not complaining, but the shipping charge is $10. Why should I pay $15 for something that is defective in the first place, I asked myself. So now I turn to you for help.

I would be grateful if IKEA would simply ship me a new stopper to replace the defective one, or a new ORREVIK strainer kit (Article Number: 102.270.22) whichever is easiest, at no charge.

My address is:

[Redacted]

Email: [redacted]

Phone: [redacted]

I love my new IKEA bathroom. Please help me make it perfect.

With Kindest Regards,

[Redacted]

IKEA Enthusiast Extraordinaire